can I trust you?

cry. i failed miserably.
i was convicted. not to do things for eye service but to please the Lord.
our CEO was visiting our dept and knowing that he is somewhere
around and could be listening to me...
i deliberately put in extra effort to do a 'good job'.
well, to impress others, you know.

smile...guess what. i was gently rebuked....
i should be doing these things to please the Lord
not to please man. or for selfish reasons...

i used to ask God. can i trust You? trust You to save me.
trust You to protect me. trust You to provide for me.
i am given a new perspective....can i be trusted??
can i be trusted with the things of God. can i be trusted with God's people.
can i be trusted with the gifts given to me. can i be trusted with what God
puts in my hands.
God is asking: can I trust you?
i have failed. i felt so sorry. i am glad it was exposed to me.
and i am learning. to be a faithful servant.

heart

our heart. the vital organ for our being.
Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life. Prob4:23

Do not harden your hearts, as in the rebellion,
As in the day of trial in the wilderness, When your fathers tested Me;
They tried Me, though they saw My work.
For forty years I was grieved with that generation,
And said, ‘It is a people who go astray in their hearts,
And they do not know My ways.’ So I swore in My wrath,
‘They shall not enter My rest.’ Psalms 95:8-11

Wait on the LORD; Be of good courage,
And He shall strengthen your heart; Wait, I say, on the LORD Psamls 31

i am still trying to make sense out of these.....
my heart has been strengthened. i know it. but how did it happened?
by waiting on the Lord i believe. my straying heart is now given to the Lord.
i want to give my whole heart to the Lord. All of Him and none of me.

One thing I have desired of the LORD,
That will I seek: That I may dwell in the house of the LORD
All the days of my life, To behold the beauty of the LORD,
And to inquire in His temple.